Delivered from Death: Finding Hope in the Darkness of Addiction

Estimated reading time: 7 minutes

A Story of Biblical Deliverance

There is a story in Mark 5:1-20 of the Bible about a demon-possessed man whom Jesus delivered from certain death by casting out a legion of demons. Perhaps the reason the Bible does not tell us this man’s name is that his story could be any one of ours, if it were not for God’s grace. This man without a name lived in—of all places, a cemetery, among the dead. No one could restrain him, not even with chains. The townspeople had shackled and chained him several times. However, each time he pulled the chains apart and broke the shackles into pieces. Clearly, he was under the influence of something greater than him. Had Jesus not intervened, he would have certainly succumbed to death at the hands of the demons that had him bound.

The interesting thing about this story is how it ended. As Jesus was leaving the town, the man who had been demon-possessed wanted to leave with Him. However, Jesus did not permit him, but said, “Go home to your friends, and tell them what great things the Lord has done for you, and how He has had compassion on you.”

If it were not for the grace of God, I would have surely died a prisoner of drug addiction. However, God delivered me from certain death, and for that, I am eternally grateful. The Lord’s command to me was the same as to the Gadarene man: “Go and tell of this great thing the Lord has done for you, and how He has had compassion on you.”

This blog is a testament to how the Lord had compassion on me and how He broke the chains of my 13-year drug addiction, delivering me from certain death.

Addiction is Spiritual Bondage

When the chains of addiction had me bound, like the Gadarene man, I was lost and certain that I would die. I couldn’t trust myself to save myself. The people I hung out with were just as lost; their glazed eyes mirrored my own despair. I felt trapped in a cycle that robbed me of hope. I desperately desired to be delivered from this death. Each day only blurred into the next. My addiction made me break each promise to quit. Crack cocaine proved stronger than my will.

An Encounter with the Deliverer

After 13 years of an addiction to crack cocaine, my body grew weaker. With every passing day, the weight of my choices haunted me. The memories of who I used to be seemed to slip further away. I felt isolated, unable to escape the relentless cycle of self-condemnation. The fear of what lay ahead intensified with each passing night, until I reached a point where I knew I had to seek help beyond myself. I knew that if I kept chasing that little white stone, I would eventually be delivered up to death, which would be the inevitable end of me. That night, I opened the Bible, searching for God. It opened to Psalm 116. When I read this Psalm in its entirety, I felt as though I was reading my own life. These verses stood out and came alive:

“I love you, Lord!
    You answered my prayers.
You paid attention to me,
and so I will pray to you
    as long as I live.
Death attacked from all sides,
and I was captured
    by its painful chains.
But when I was really hurting,
I prayed and said, “Lord,
    please don’t let me die!”
—Psalm 116:1-4 CEV

Surrender is Dying to Self

After days without rest, my heart was so weary it barely felt alive. In my hopelessness, I felt as though I was suffocating. It left me physically exhausted and emotionally empty. Yet, something deep within me longed to be delivered from the death of addiction. In those darkest moments, I suddenly realized that my longing for freedom was not just about escaping addiction, but about finding a reason to believe that change was possible. That sense of desperation gradually cracked open the door to faith.

As I stumbled through the haze of each day, I began whispering silent prayers. It was a last-ditch effort to reach beyond my brokenness. I was in a fragile place of surrender. In this tender moment, God planted a seed of hope in my heart. He was preparing me for the night when everything would begin to change.

God’s Word Brings Light

As I sat with the open Bible in my lap, the quiet of the night pressed around me, but the words of Psalm 116 echoed in my heart, speaking directly to the depths of my pain. In that instant, I realized I was not alone in my struggle. My story was etched within the ancient lines of Scripture, and the God who delivered the psalmist was offering the same grace to me. With trembling hands and tears streaming down my face, I embraced the truth that hope was possible even in such darkness. My encounter with God through His written word became the turning point: the promise of deliverance was no longer just for someone else, but a lifeline for me—a personal invitation to trust that mercy could meet me right where I was, and that healing could begin with a single, honest cry for help.

That evening, I cried out to the Lord in prayer, literally crying. Besides a sofa, there was one lone piece of furniture in my living room—an oak coffee table. As I walked around this table in the dark, I began singing a song that welled up in my spirit. The words were simple: “Make me a man like Joshua, Jesus, make me a man like him.”

Inner Strength Comes Through Prayer

With each trembling step around that table, my voice trembling and raw, the darkness in the room seemed to press in tighter, yet the melody in my heart grew stronger. In that holy moment, a quiet strength began to rise within me, carrying my prayer upward as if God Himself leaned in to listen. I poured out my desperation and longing with every word, asking not just for freedom from my struggle, but for the courage and faith of Joshua. Joshua had fearless faith. He followed God despite fear and impossibility.

As I sang into the silence, the room felt less empty, as though hope itself had crept in beside me. Though I didn’t know it then, this simple act of surrender—my weary voice lifted in the darkness—became a turning point. It set the stage for the breakthrough that would soon follow. For the first time, I admitted out loud that I was powerless to help myself. In that moment of utter vulnerability, I cried out to God with every ounce of desperation left in me. “Lord, please save me—I can’t do this anymore.”

The Peace of Silence

The silence that followed felt heavy, yet deep within my heart I sensed a glimmer of hope. I remembered the words of the psalmist: “I love you, Lord! You answered my prayers. You paid attention to me, and so I will pray to you as long as I live.”

When I surrendered my fears and pain to God, I felt a strange peace—a soft but undeniable presence that replaced the panic and anguish. My chest loosened, the suffocating grip of death eased, and for the first time in years, I allowed myself to hope for something more. That night, Jesus, the chain breaker, broke the chains that bound me for 13 years. In the stillness that followed, I was awed by a sense of freedom I had never known before. I sensed that the storm within me had calmed. I don’t know how, but I knew that God had delivered me from death by crack cocaine.

Divine Intervention

The simple act of calling out to God had ushered in a fresh beginning. I realized that deliverance was not an ending, but the first step of a new journey. It was a chance to walk forward in hope. I trusted that the One who had answered me would continue to guide and sustain me every day that followed.

Looking back, I realize that the Lord delivered me from death that night. Only the Lord could have reached into that desperate place and broken the hold that addiction had on my life. His mercy and power lifted me out of despair when no one else could.

Now, gratitude fills my heart every time I reflect on what God has done for me. The fear and desperation that once defined my life have given way to hope and purpose. Although I still face challenges, now I understand that I am not alone.

Faith now shapes my days. I wake up thankful, I seek strength in prayer, and I share my journey to encourage others who feel trapped in addiction. Deliverance was not just a single event for me, but an ongoing transformation, and I continue to lean on God’s mercy and power as I walk forward, one day at a time.

Whatever has you bound, call out to the Lord in prayer. My story echoes the truth that when you are at your lowest, if you cry out, God is always near, willing, able, and ready to answer. I am a living witness that He is there for you, to bring you back into the land of the living.